We had an amazing night together.
It was intimate, passionate and it felt SO GOOD to be together. The connection was obvious. The sparks were there.
But then he disappeared.
Why? Why do guys distance themselves after intimacy?
The heart and soul-opening intimacy we shared made me suddenly realize that I have real feelings for him. He MUST feel the same way, right?
But here you are again, vulnerable, exposed, screaming inside because he suddenly withdraws from your life.
Are they all really only interested in sex (or the chase) and have no capability of having any real emotions?
Or is it me? Is it just me? Why does this keep happening to me?
I (literally) showed all my cards to him. I put my heart and soul out there, and he doesn’t even bother to call, text or send a postcard (if he is from the 19th century).
So I call him. He doesn’t answer.
I wait for 24 hours (that feel like a month) and I text him.
24 hours later I text him again.
It’s like he never existed.
What the hell is going on here??
Why Do Guys Distance Themselves After Intimacy?
When this stuff happened to me for the third time in my life, I’ve decided to take a break from dating and get some useful information.
I vowed to read as many guides and books needed to prevent my heart (and self-esteem) from being broken like this – ever again.
Let’s start with a few possible reasons for a guy to pull away after sex:
1. He Just CAN’T
I knew a guy like that once. He told me right from the start that he is not interested in a relationship because he always loses interest after a few months.
I ignored it, like so many women do, and thought I could change him.
But I couldn’t.
(He is 42 today and still single)
When women ignore it when guys say upfront that they’re not interested in a relationship – it’s one of the biggest dating mistakes women make.
When guys say it, they mean it. They are not playing games.
2. The Chasing Gene
All guys are hunters. If the hunt is over, he will go on to hunt his next “dinner”. It’s an ego thing, a competitive instinct.
I wouldn’t want you to lose a great possible boyfriend because you made him run around in circles for far too long.
I’ve learned all about “The Hunter Principal”, why “hunting” is important to every man and how to use it to my advantage – the right way.
3. He’s a Player
I hate this term but players are everywhere. These guys are more than addicted to the chase.
They’re addicted to their ego. These guys usually suffer from low self-esteem and depend on the notches on their belt to feel good about themselves.
They don’t love themselves, so they can’t love anyone else.
4. He can smell “Clinginess”
Guys hate neediness and clinginess (just like women by the way).
If he sensed some clinging signs from you, this may have caused him to pull away. Unfortunately, this is a big turn-off for guys (and girls).
How to Make Him Regret It
You’ve probably already made a few mistakes as we all do.
You’ve probably called him first. You’ve probably sent some texts. You’ve probably shown your desperation and anger.
It’s o.k. It’s human.
First of all, do not send one more text.
And don’t even think about calling him.
If necessary, stay away from alcohol completely to avoid horrific drunk texting.
Second, make him realize you do NOT need him.
Third, make chasing you HIS idea (without him realizing it at all) and make him beg YOU for commitment – without threats, ultimatums, tears, begging or pleading.
Unfortunately, I can’t reveal to you exactly how to do these things without outright stealing Clair Casey’s ideas from their book…
I can tell you that my hard work (so much reading, oh my god) was worth it and it’s been a hell of a long time since I’ve been played, hunted or heart-broken.
I wish the same to you.
Rooting for ya,