I know it may be hard for you to face the truth right now, but chances are that if the boyfriend is distant, the boyfriend is on his way out.
The heart breaking truth is this: If he is cold, distant and uninterested for more than a couple of days, he’s not “just going through a phase”, or “suffering from hormonal imbalance.”
And he won’t “just get over it with time”. Timing is crucial and you can’t just ignore this situation if you want your relationship to survive.
My Boyfriend is Distant – Why?
Though this is a question only you can answer, I can guess the possible reasons without knowing you or your relationship at all:
1. He is angry at you and not revealing why – if you recently had a fight, or you have an issue that keeps coming up in your relationship, he may be angry at you.
Instead of talking to you about it and dealing with the problem, he chooses to avoid the conflict (most men do that) and pull away from you, keeping a “safe” distance.
2. He feels guilty about something “bad” that he did, or planning to do. Again, instead of dealing with the consequences, he chooses to run away.
3. He is losing interest. For some reason he is losing interest in you and your relationship. This makes him step back and think about his next steps and figure out his emotions.
4. He feels that he is no longer in love with you and planning to break up with you.
Men don’t like to be direct and rather slowly and gradually disappear from a relationship, instead of ending things directly (usually refered to as the horrible “fade out breakup”).
Can You Prevent Him from Slipping Away?
Most women react the same way when their man becomes distant for no apparent reason. Women are rational creatures, so we start to compare:
- He used to call me 3 timed a day. Now he only calls once.
- He used to rush back home to see me right after work. Now he wants to go out more with his friends.
- He used to kiss me goodbye when he left the house. Now he barely says bye.
- He used to tell me how much he loves me. He used to hug and kiss me all the time. Now he seems to avoid getting near me.
The clearer the picture becomes, the more scared you get about losing him.
So you try to do anything you can to please him and show him how much you love him. You become obsessed with pushing away that break up cloud hanging over your relationship.
But that only pushes him away further.
You become angry, frustrated, hurt. You lose control and lash out at him.
Game over.
It Doesn’t Have to Happen Like This.
I t’s not too late and NOT all hope is gone. Actually, you can turn things around even if he has already left and even if he is already seeing someone else.
You can turn the clock back to when you were the happiest together, if you just get the right tools and learn HOW to do it.
Just because he is acting cold and distant – doesn’t mean that he doesn’t love you. Just because he won’t open up to you now, doesn’t mean you can’t GET him to open up.
First, discover whether your boyfriend shows signs that he is going to break up with you – HERE.
Always rooting for ya,
Lisa
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