Are you stressed and frustrated when it comes to flirting with a guy?
Do you feel awkward and painfully obvious when you try to get a guy’s attention through flirting?
Flirting subtly with a guy is an “art” that some women seem to be born with, while others avoid in sheer panic that the guy will disappear before they finish their first sentence.
Here you’ll discover the simple secrets to handle “guy situations” without stress and frustration.
Learning these few simple “tricks” will turn you into a master of flirting and from “nice” – to irresistible – faster than you can imagine.
Ready? Let’s go!
The Power of Subtle Flirting
Well, if you’ll ask a supermodel, then no.
Supermodels, and other women who look like them, get approached by guys so much that they don’t really need to flirt to get a guy’s attention, right?
But since most of us are not human Barbie dolls, flirting can be a powerful tool.
So powerful that it can help you get any guy you want, no matter how you (or he) look like.
A few years ago I worked with a woman who not very attractive-looking, to say the least.
We were 8 women, all of us better looking than her, working with about 15 single men.
It didn’t take long before I noticed that she was getting most of these mens’ attention and was constantly being asked out on dates.
I was so curious about this that I literally followed her around everywhere.
I quickly realized 2 things that set her apart from the rest of us: She was extremely confident, she smiled literally all the time, and she was a master at flirting – without being obvious about it at all.
See my point?
Guys tend to be attracted and drawn to women they can flirt with.
At the same time, they are turned off by women who flirt aggressively and show their obvious attraction, because they like to feel they have made the first move.
All you have to do is make the guy think he’s making the first move when you’re the one really doing it…
And no, winking at a guy is not flirting. It’s a way to make him think you have a nerve injury.
Well, it’s not as complicated as you think.
(👉 Read: Should I Tell Him I Like Him? (pros & cons)
How to Flirt with a Guy Without Being Obvious
Knowing how to flirt with a guy subtly, will get you his attention and his (uncontrolled) attraction towards you – before he even understands why.
Here are the best ways to get a guy’s attention – in any situation:
1. Use Eye Contact
Of all the body language ways to flirt with a guy, this one seems obvious, but I’ll bet you’re not aware of the powerful effect of a long-staring type of eye contact.
When you’re trying to get a guy’s attention from afar, stare at him until he becomes aware of it and makes eye contact with you.
Don’t look away when he does!
When his eyes meet yours, keep gazing deeply into his eyes, and smile a little smile.
This is the ultimate way to flirt without being obvious.
If you already talking to the guy – keep eye contact as much as you can.
As you listen to what he says, look in his eyes and don’t stop. After a few minutes, he will feel like you are looking into his soul.
👉 Flirty truth or dares are a great way to flirt without revealing your attraction towards him.
2. Find His Passion
This subtle way of flirting requires a few minutes of thinking.
If you already know a few things about your crush, use them to strike up a conversation.
If you know he likes music, or some kind of sports – find a simple way to get him to talk to you about it.
If he likes music, start a conversation about a concert you want to go to. If it’s football – comment about the last game that was in the news.
If you don’t know anything about him, look at his sneakers, his T-Shirt, whether he has jewelry on him, anything that can be a conversation starter.
When I was single I saw a cute guy on a flight to Los Angeles. I could see from his T-shirt that he likes some band.
I was sitting one row in front of him, so I started playing my Ipod and casually got up and walked around with it, than got back to my seat after he saw me.
2 minutes later he asked me about what I’m listening to. We spent the whole flight talking and went out for a few dates in L.A.
This is a powerful flirting method you can use with anyone, without making any “move” and without even having to make eye contact.
👉 If you have his phone number, see how to flirt with a guy over text
3. Use Your Hair
Guys love it when girls run their hands through their hair.
The next time you’re talking to your crush, casually run your hand through your hair (and smile if appropriate at that point). Or tuck your hair behind your ears to show off your pretty face.
This will show him your confidence, while still being “girly” and vulnerable – 2 things a guy can’t resist!
4. Compliment Him Over Text
Guys, much like us girls, like to get a cute compliment.
If you like something about a guy, make sure you compliment him about it.
He will love it that you noticed something great about him, and if you find something that isn’t so obvious (like his looks, for example) – even better.
But whatever you do, don’t fake it.
Guys will notice a fake compliment and interpret it as a miserable attempt to flirt aggressively, which is not what we’re trying to do.
I wouldn’t compliment a guy about his looks (too obvious) but I would compliment his great sense of humor – if he has one.
5. Accidental/Casual Touching
Guys skip a beat when a woman who flirts with them suddenly (and gently) touches them.
The only places “allowed” and recommended are his arms, his shoulder, or his back.
It makes them feel more comfortable and wanted, and more importantly – it makes them open to you when they talk to you, and encourages them to flirt with you further.
But don’t grab his arm and tell him how huge his muscles are. Nope.
Subtle touching is leaning against him and putting your cheek on his shoulder for a split second while you laugh at one of his jokes.
How to Flirt with a Guy at Work
Working with a guy you like gives you a great advantage.
You get to see him every day and you already have work in common, right?
Here are a few easy ways to flirt with your crush at work:
- Lift your eyebrows subtly when you look at him and smile
- Touch him subtly (a pat on the shoulder) – when you have a chance
- Compliment him on his work, or the way he treats other work colleagues.
- Show him your fun side, so something silly or funny when you’re around him
- Use a “work excuse” to text him after work hours
How to Get Him to Ask You Out (Through Flirting)
To tell you the truth, I always thought that you don’t have to be a flirting guru to get a guy’s attention, but that was before I stumbled upon Mimi Tanner’s program – Secrets of Flirting with Men.
📢 Her guide has the best advice I’ve ever read about how to use flirting to get a guy uncontrollably attracted to you, longing to get to know you better and make you his and only his.
And best of all, she makes it seem so simple, that anyone can do it – even if you’re one of those that faint before they manage to get a word out around their crush.
(She even teaches you the easy signs to help you find out how you’re doing in the process, so you can avoid embarrassment or humiliation…).
Mimi claims that the ability to flirt with guys is the single most important love life skill that every woman needs to know and that it can help you not only find the love of your life but keep him by your side forever.
And at this point, I agree. I’m going to use her great advice to bring back the spark between me and dear hubby…(Don’t tell him please…)
How about you? What’s the worst flirting experience you’ve ever had? What was your best? I can’t wait to see some of your stories in the comments.
Rooting for ya,
There’s this guy that I like and I don’t know what to do or say. He stares at me,until I look at him back. And one time he was on the phone and I heard with my own two ears he said he liked one of his co-workers. And he started a whole conversation that lasted about 40 minutes literally. That’s the longest I ever talked to a boy. What should I do?
honestly, eye contact is the game. Once you’ve mastered it, you can pull basically anyone 😉
I really like this guy and sometimes he’s super friendly and others he ignores me. I just don’t get it. He’s always staring at me and trying to show off. If he does something cool he’ll always glance over at me. But he sometimes just walks straight past me, then the next day starts to talk to me then the next day avoids me. What do I do?
Maybe you should try to talk to him every day!
i’ve got a really big problem with eye contacts. I can’t really stare at my crush until he notice it. I’ll just feel nerveous. I tried it a few days ago and looked away when he noticed i was looking at him. Is there anything else you think i can do?
Lisa Redfield says
Yes, you can try the other tips that I talk about in this post. Many people have this problem, don’t feel bad about it. Good luck!
i think it will be nice for a girl to play with her hair when talking to a guy. my (male) friends thinks its makes a girl look confidence nice and cute.
Thanks for posting this! Really helpful! Now people are saying we’re more friends, which is now true because of you, thanks!
I wish I knew how to flirt… No matter how much help I get I still flirt like a nervous wreck. ;(
Hey! Sometimes being a nervous wreck is the cutest thing you can do. I asked my best friend(who is a dude) and he said that when girls are nervous, it makes the girl cuter. Also, when she plays it off the right way. So 3 things:
-Play with your hair
-Have good posture
When I played with my hair on my first date with my crush, I could see him surprised! It worked
I dont think that you have to play with your hair i was talking with my guy friends and they said they hate that cus they feel like u think your hair is more important than they r