Flirting with a guy over text is scary, isn’t it?
He can’t see, hear, smell or feel you at the moment. It feels like your entire existence is being judged by what and how you text.
You have to be your best self, or you won’t get another chance.
How can you be playful, witty, flirty and charming – in only 1 or 2 sentences?
How can you make him want more and more from you – while forgetting other girls even exist?
And what if he doesn’t answer and completely ignore you? What if he thinks “I can’t see this girl in my life”?
In this guide about how to flirt with a guy over text I’ll show you that it’s much easier than you think.
Flirting with your crush over text can be fun, easy and fail-proof, if you follow a few simple “rules” you’ll see below,
(plus you’ll get 27 flirty text examples, to help you get started)
Ready? Let’s go.
How to Flirt With a Guy over Text: 8 Golden Rules
Follow these easy guided lines and you’re on your way to winning his heart through text:
1. Be Unique (By Being Yourself)
You want him to like YOU, not a made up person he won’t recognize when he talks to you face to face.
Write something that no one else would write but you.
By writing about experiences you’ve shared together. About things that you talked about or laughed about in person.
* “That band you told me about is playing this weekend. You going?”
* “Hi Cutie! How do you think you did on the English test?”
2. Use His Name
Try to use his name occasionally. Especially in your first text. This will get him subconsciously engaged in the conversation and make him feel closer to you.
If you have a silly nickname for your crush, use it in your first text.
3. Ask an Open Question
Asking an open-ended question is a great way to flirt with your crush over text, because he will be flattered that you want to start a conversation with him and know his opinions about stuff.
It’s an ego-booster, and we all know how important ego is for guys.
Keep it simple – ask about something that happened during the day or week, like “How was your mini vacation this week? As fun as you expected?”
Don’t ask questions that can be answered with only a “yes:” or no”. Give him room to elaborate.
Don’t ask philosophical questions that he won’t know how to answer or will give up due to being too puzzled.
(Here are 88 fun questions to ask a guy – use them)
* “What’d you think about last night’s episode of…?”
* “How was your friend’s birthday party yesterday?”
* “Noticed you still weren’t back at school today. How are you feeling?”
* “What’s the weirdest text you’ve ever received from a girl?”
4. Make Him Laugh
In my opinion, making a guy laugh is the best way to make him fall for you.
When a guy sees a message from you and smiles (or even better – laughs out loud) – he is half way in love with you.
Start with a short funny statement about something you both saw or talked about recently.
Don’t get stressed about being funny. Keep it simple.
* “Stop making me think about you. I’m busy.”
(This one is especially effective – it is both funny and flirty at the same time).
* What would you do if I told you that I have an identical twin sister? (Add a wink emoticon)
* “I’m thinking about becoming celibate for the rest of my life, what do you think?”
* “Do you think you could beat me in an arm wrestle?”
* “Stop thinking about me. I said stop!”
5. Tease Him
Another great way to flirt with him over the phone or text: Teasing him.
You can (gently) make fun of your crush, we all like a good tease, as long as you make sure he understands you’re not serious.
Keep it light. You can laugh about his fear from germs or about him too tight with his guitar.
Send a wink face emoticon to show that you’re just teasing.
6. Compliment Him
Every guy likes compliments. Compliment him on his looks, his personality, his athletic abilities, or what he’s worn earlier.
Just don’t over do it!
Men love to be adored and admired by women, so heap on the praise!
* “Had fun last night. Thanks again for feeding and entertaining me.”
* “Thou art to me a delicious torment.”
* “I just want to be upfront and say that I visually enjoy you.”
* “You’re lucky you’re so cute. That’s why I keep you around.”
7. Use Emoticons
Since you don’t have the luxury of body language when you text, emoticons come in handy to help clarify your intentions.
And they’re always better, btw, than another “lol” or “haha”.
8. Leave Him Wanting More
Try to always end the conversation first. Why? So you’ll leave him wanting more.
Instead of dragging the conversation until you can’t think of anything else to write, or worse – he just stops answering – leave it exactly when both of you are highly engaged.
But, while you’re ending your text conversation, let him know that you’re looking forward to your next talk.
* “Past my bedtime…enjoyed talking to you. Talk tomorrow?”
* “Got to go to girls’ night out. Drunk-text you later?”
Flirty Texts to Make Him Ask You Out
Flirty texting can easily get you a (date) proposal. The most obvious way is to find the likes that you share and use them to hang out together (on his initiative!)
You can ask him about a new movie or a restaurant. It can turn into making plans to go and see them.
* “At Starbucks studying. Can’t do it anymore. Save me?”
* “Would u rather…get your foot stuck in a bear trap or hang out this weekend?”
* “That new Mexican place has great guacamole. I think you’ll like it as much as I do”.
* “Some friends are going bowling tomorrow night. Don’t come if you’re afraid of losing. To me.”
* Tried the new doughnut shop tonight. You need to check it out!”
* “Hey Kevin..how good are you with your hands?“(Follow up with a message about how you need a shoulder massage)
* “Girls’ night tonight! I’m going to want a testosterone fix tomorrow. You game?”
Avoid THESE Texting Mistakes
1. Don’t send boring first texts like “What’s up?” and “How are you?”
2. Don’t come on too strong – don’t send a text like “Would you be mad if we made Saturday ‘Naked Day’?”
Try to keep your flirting subtle. If you come on too strong your crush will feel like he “has you” and won’t get to chase you like he likes to (and they all do).
You can always keep it subtle by writing something like “I just got out of the shower. What do you think – skirt or dress?” or “I’m trying my new clothes on” etc.
This way he will automatically imagine you getting out of the shower, but you won’t seem to aggressively flirty.
3. Make sure you’re not always the first one to text. For the same reasons above.
4. Don’t try too hard to be funny or clever. One minute is more than enough to think about something. If you can’t, put it aside and text him later.
5. Spell check. This should be obvious by now. Spelling mistakes are a huge turn off.
6. Don’t ever ask him if he likes you over text. Huge mistake.
Text Flirting with Your Crush – Conclusion
Flirty texts reveal your personality. He can learn so much about you from your texts, which makes the whole thing intimidating and frustrating.
If he answers your texts quickly and with decently long sentences, congratulations. You did great.
If he sends a lot of one word texts and takes a lot of time to answer – he isn’t hooked just yet (or is texting another girl at the same time).
Used correctly, flirty texts can make him fall head over hills in love with you.
Want to turn him off? Send just one inappropriate text. Or a misspelled one. Or text him 9 times before he answers.
(By the way, if you want to get your ex back, flirty texts are the wrong way to go. Here’s my post about how to use texting to get him back)
What do you think about flirty texts? A friend or an enemy? What’s your experience?
Rooting for ya,