Do you feel like you’ll burst into flames if you don’t tell him you like him – right now?
Do you spend hours analyzing the pros and cons of telling your crush that you like him?
Well, you should.
You should think long and hard before you take this irreversible step.
Because telling a guy you like him can go great (if he likes you too) or go extremely wrong (if he doesn’t feel the same).
(Not sure if he serious about you or just playing? (Here’s how to find out if he is serious)
In this post I’ll explain:
1. Why it’s a very bad idea to tell a guy you like him first (unless you possess a certain “quality” I’ll mention below)
2. Why it’s a bad idea to tell a guy you like him over text
3. Why it’s a bad idea to tell your best guy friend that you like him
4. The many simple ways to tell a guy you like him – without actually saying it (and facing rejection).
First, here’s why telling a guy you like him can be a catastrophic mistake for you:
Should you Tell a Guy You Like Him FIRST?
Don’t ever tell a guy you like him first.
(Unless you are absolutely sure that he likes you too and no one else!)
For 2 main reasons:
1. The Irreversible Damage of Rejection
If he likes you back – great. He’ll reciprocate and you’ll live happily ever after.
If you are not completely sure that your crush likes you too, and has about the same feelings for you as you do for him, you are facing an embarrassing and irreversible REJECTION.
I believe that all those who will tell you that rejection is no big deal, and you just bitch about it with your gal pals and get over it in an hour – has never been face-to-face rejected in his life.
“I like you as a friend, but I’m not ready for a relationship”
“I think you’re great, but I don’t do dating right now”
These are only 2 of the possible let-you-down sayings you may hear from him, while your heart sinks to the floor and you don’t know where to bury yourself.
This blow to your ego can be overcome, guaranteed. BUT, this situation is almost irreversible. You will lose hope about ever being with him, and for NO good reason.
Sure, he may not want to date you now, or hasn’t developed the same feelings for you, but if you gave it more time, he COULD have.
But after being rejected, you won’t sit around, looking at him with puppy eyes and wait for him to change his mind. Right?
(I hope you nodding your head with me).
If you didn’t “force” him, in a way, to decide right now how he feels about you (that’s what happens when you tell your crush you like him) – He would have had more time to get to know you and fall head over heels for you.
2. The Chase Element
I know it’s annoying, and completely odd that in the 21st century guys still need the chase to develop romantic feelings.
But it’s still true.
Guys need the chase. Most of them anyway.
And when they don’t get a chance to chase, they can lose interest quite fast.
It doesn’t mean that you have to play games and change who you are. But at least don’t make it completely effortless for them, by telling them you like them.
For Every Rule There is an Exception
If you an exceptionally confident girl/woman, who knows her worth, does not live through her ego and can handle rejection easily – Go ahead, confess away.
If you can imagine every scenario once you tell him that you like him, and feel good about what ever happens, go on and tell him that you like him. Get it off your chest and hope for the best.
Should You Tell a Guy You Like Him Over Text?
Again, if he likes you back, he’ll see your text, find a cute way to text you that he likes you back and you’ll start talking about your future kids.
But if he doesn’t, rejection over text can be more humiliating than a face-to-face one.
Texting is a whole different world.
It seems so much easier to tell a guy you like him over text.
You feel you can safely hide behind your phone and think that if you don’t have to look at him, you can handle any response from him – good or bad.
But again – nope.
Texting a guy you like him (and I mean writing these exact words, not just flirting!) is exactly the same as telling him to his face. Or worse.
1. Because even though you can’t see him when he opens your text, at some point you WILL see him.
And if you were rejected, all the embarrassment and awkwardness will happen, just as if you told him face to face.
2. It’s even more hurtful to be rejected over text than face to face. He has so many options:
– To completely ignore your text
– To reject you through a joke or in a disrespectful way
– To question your honesty or think that you’re joking (“why does tell me over text”? He’ll ask himself)
Either way, you’ll suffer from all the above-mentioned side effects of rejection, making it impossible to even look him in the eyes next time you see him.
Just like being dumped through a text is much worse than being dumped face to face, being rejected over text is worse than in person.
Should You Tell Your Best Guy Friend you Love Him?
You are head over hills on love with your best guy friend. You won’t be the first, that’s for sure.
But either you don’t know if he feels the same, or you’ve been friend-zoned for a while now.
Should you take the chance and tell this guy that you love him?
If you are scientifically sure that he feels the same, and hasn’t said it because he is afraid to ruin your friendship – Go ahead and tell him how you feel.
It’s the right and smart thing to do.
But if you’re not sure he feels the same, and you are in the friend zone, don’t tell him you like him. Yet.
Here’s how to get out of the friend zone and become his girlfriend.
It’s easier than you think.
If you’re friends with benefits – here’s what to do when you are FWB.
How to SHOW a Guy You Like Him – Without Saying It
Fortunately, there are dozens of crazy simple ways to show your crush that you like him, without actually saying it and facing rejection.
You can tell a guy you like him – through flirting.
Flirting is the universal way of showing romantic (or just physical) attraction.
Believe it or not, just a great smile and eye contact – done repeatedly every time you see him – Can be enough to get his attention and realize that you like him.
You can easily do it without being obvious, and give him the little “nudge” that he needs to come and tell you that he likes you – FIRST.
Or even just eagerly ask you out.
Wouldn’t that be terrific?
No matter how many self-improvement blogs we’ll read, most of us have a hard time handling and overcoming rejection.
Unless we are extremely confident with loads of self-esteem – repeated rejection can scar us for life – making us afraid of the future and our capability to have a stable relationship.
But rejection can be easily avoided.
You don’t have to tell a guy you like him. You can show him. You can make HIM take the first step, thinking that it was all his idea in the first place.
Without losing hope about your dream relationship.
All you need is just a little patience, and the right “tools”, which I hope I’ve given you here.
What do you think? Am I wrong or am I right?
Should you tell a guy you like him first? Can you really handle rejection?
Did you ever tell a guy you liked him first and it turned out great? I’d love to hear your stories, share with me in the comments below.
Rooting for ya,
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